You've got yourself a very dependent spouse there. My feeling is that he's bored with life and himself and he needs a hobby. I know someone like that. He's 75 and he doesn't do anything, so I think he could solve his problems by doing a hobby or even housework, do SOMETHING! So yeah, maybe it's better for you not to 'reward' him with reassurances when he talks that way, cos then he just continues. Don't feel bad about yourself though, you sound like you've had all you can handle.