i sure have my times of darkness but i hate being there for too long.
i too have been in therapy "forever" and have learned that when i am feeling like giving up or a "new" thing comes up it is time to really put all my recovery to work. it's hard, i know...it's a practice i have finally begun to understand.

it's ok for me to have those dark times and feel on the edge of giving up and get support from others....but it's not ok for me to actually give up and quit...as tempting and as easy a path it is. i get tired of fighting, tired of practicing, tired of having to face the crap day after day---but i am also beginning to see that i can put all the crap on the shelf and enjoy some good things....nature, time with a friend and just having fun without the baggage. That take some practice.......

i hope for you that you can find a bit of hope in your struggle.
just a sliver and that would be enough for you to go back to the "practice of recovery"