(((((((secret))))))
have been on a similar path. as scary as this path is, remember there are many hands reaching out to you. i'm glad you have no "plans" but that doesn't make it any less painful.
i found that there are clearings on this scary path where i could breathe a bit and see just enough sun shine to feel the "rays of hope" if for just a few seconds. others who have traveled this way encouraged me as we are encouraging you.