Seeker, and others got an e mail from her today. I was so excited by seeing her name on on-my incoming mail list. I had such a strong body reaction when i opened the note. My throat went dry. My fingers became numb and my heart was racing. It was like Christmas and and something else a feeling of dread. I read the e mail quickly skimming over much looking for both the negative and positive words. Neither was there it was short chatty note. she did say thank you for giving her some space and ask how i was doing. Over all it was hard to get any idea of what she was thinking or feeling. She neither ask me to write or ask me not to write. her email to me I will take as a good sign. Still I won't read to much into it.
yes seeker we met via match.com both of us were about to quite when she sent her first email to me. I fell in love with her words long before we had our first date. On that date it was like every word we said to each other confirmed a feeling that we had always known each other. That we were Kindred spirits who had spent years searching for each other. It ws in that first evening that we both put our match profiles on hold. i didn't want any distractions. I also wrote to a woman that i had been writing to and told her I was now seeing someone. I wished her luck .
Once again i have dug deep into my soul my heart aches There are a few things that are my truth. #1; I am in love with Linda. it is the heady rush of new born love. One that i believe could lead to that lasting love this giddy excitement this rush of emotion could lead to that deep love the love that is quite and patient.
32 Is that even if she does not feel that same love for me . I am happy that i have had this time and been able to feel this way. The joy far out weights the pain. I own both the Joy and the pain they are mine. they are part of being alive of having a heart.
#3 In my own time i will tell her . I will tell her that she is loved If she can't return that love if in her heart she just does not have those feeling for me then we both need to move on. i am a good man a worthy man I deserve to be loved for all that i am and all that I am not.
#4; if there is spark there if she has some fears or whatever holding her back I will do what i can to ease those fears and Help her see as a team as partners we could good for each other.