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05:14 AM

Thank you sweet people for your wonderful caring words! I so appreciate them!
Please know I care about you too!

Too much… for far too long...
Fighting to get the authorities to understand the most crucial needs... and still they seem to lack a lot both in the brain- and the heart department.
We’ve just appealed for the second time to get benefit/extra care money because of our son (who's got Asperger's, ADHD traits in the form of impulsivity… )... they seem to think we’re just sitting here rolling our thumbs while the assistants are working… duh… WRONG. I write social stories, create schedules, and tutor the assistants since they’ve not gotten any professional to do that… (that after being here for 8 months!). When our son gets violent it often takes three adults to hold him and I’m always the one who manages to calm him down and so to say “bring him back to reality… here and now”. I get hurt by him kicking, punching, sometimes biting… (the others takes some beating too). I try my hardest to be there for our daughter to see to her needs and to protect her. She needs me too!

Then… now they don’t see my issues as my own… but instead they seem to think it’s only because of my son I’m feeling bad and not working. They don’t want to put me up as sick for all future because I’m still young... hmm… I’ve got Asperger’s disorder, OCD, depression, dissociation- and depersonalisation issues… I had a hard time in life already before having our children. Back then I didn’t know that I had AS and OCD and I fought each and every day to just keep going.
Our family will go under if I’m not here to see to it that our son gets the guidance and structure that he needs.
So the same organization can’t go together two units and see what on earth is going on… one part doesn’t see what we do as parents more than so called “normal parenting” and the other can’t see that I can’t go out and work in society because I’m not feeling well myself and I’m very much needed at home taking care of my son and supporting my daughter.

The waiting not knowing what is going to happen drives me nuts! I’ve taken extra anti anxiety meds this last week because it’s all way too much to deal with. At the same time I just have to be on top of things concerning my family’s daily life.

At least something positive… school started again today and the morning was calm and the children got to school without major hiccups… Breathe ooooouuuuut….

Thanks for reading! I had to get it out!