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Old Aug 19, 2009, 03:58 PM
leep1001 leep1001 is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2009
Posts: 3
Hi all,

I am new to this site, and new to ADHD, diagnosed ('mild' adhd) three weeks ago and am now taking 27 mg daily of Concerta. I had lightbulbs going off all over the place as I read this thread and wanted to just weigh in with some of my own experiences. Like some of you, I am very much an all or nothing person. I have even used that term for years without knowing I had ADHD, and wondered why so many friends seemed somewhat worried about the lack of balance in my life. I hate to even type this because it seems like such a failure, but I have become one of those eternal PhD students who can't seem to finish her dissertation. I am ABD, all but diss, and have a child with life-threatening food allergies whose condition really threw me off track for a number of years. I started this degree at 35, after a 10yr. career in journalism (during which I filed stories that were uniformly well-received by my editors but which were almost *always* either just in time or slightly late, frustrating my editors to no end and causing me to lose one great gig at a major national newspaper). I am now 44 and struggling to get back on track with academic life with a six-year-old daughter whose allergies continue to be a major challenge. Whatever I'm doing, it seems like I'm either overdoing it or not doing it at all. Right now I'm on a huge fitness kick and although this is helping get me back into my old clothes and seems to also be boosting my ability to concentrate, I can't seem to get to many of the other pressing tasks that are facing me right now. I do too little work on the dissertation every day, and there are some looming paperwork issues that need to be addressed -- getting my daughter US citizenship, filing late taxes, etc. etc....things are fairly out of control, and I seem to be pouring all of my energy into eating right and exercising -- after a long period of inactivity. When I am working toward a conference presentation I pull multiple all-nighters and am always able to present good material, but after it's over I go into a major slump, losing all of my momentum and allowing me to get disconnected from the project.

Oh goodness, this is a long post. This is my first attempt to write about my ADHD, and I appreciate your patience. Can anyone relate to any of this? Is anyone else out there trying to write something huge like a dissertation and finding it impossible? Every day I'm so convinced that I'll get a lot done, and I start out with the best of intentions, but by the end of the day I have precious little to show for my efforts. Just a lot of re-writing passages that were probably fine in the first place.

Thanks for listening. I guess I'm just throwing this out there in hopes that someone else understands what I'm going through and can offer some insight. I don't know if the Concerta is working yet. I guess I feel a bit more focused, but not remarkably so.

See ya, have good days.
L