white_iris,
I'm so sorry you are going through this tough phase in your healing. I do thank you for sharing with us.

Jmo, but it's going to take time for you to feel better about it. When you are used to feeling worthless/ugly/any number of negative things, it's going to take time to learn self love.
GIGO is usually of great help to me.

Keep reaffirming yourself, posting and let us know how you are doing, keep reaffirming yourself.

In Peace

Bat, please. Also the tape recorder in your head that is playing back garbage...