(((((Deli)))))

Part 1: I leave t feeling bad about 35% of the time, and there are many reasons why it happens. Sometimes the problem is that we opened up a deep wound and 1 hour has not been enough to process it. When the time is up, I may or may not be able to "put it away" until the following week. Containing has always been hard for me. Other times, i might leave feeling bad because i did not get what i needed from my t -- or i felt misunderstood in some way -- or i wanted to bring something up and didn't -- or i could not feel the connection with her. All of these are reasons why i might leave feeling bad. I expect to have some pretty difficult sessions, but i also expect my t to help me get grounded or contained enough so i can go back to work and do life. I would not feel OK leaving if i was feeling very suicidal. I think a t's job is to make sure we are feeling stable and well grounded before we go. My t told me once, "I can't have you coming here, and then leaving and hurting yourself."

Part 2: It sounds like you recognized pretty quickly that Austin-T was on the wrong track with what you needed. You wanted help with "completion" and not with "understanding the assignment." You were asking the question "How," not the question "What?" It also sounds like you spoke up and tried to explain that to him. But for some reason, it wasn't getting through. That would be frustrating!!!

It kind of does sound like Austin-T was exercising some of his own OCD tendencies (telling you what to write and exactly where to write it). Do you often have the kind of experience with Austin-T that you did this week, or is this rather uncommon? It sounds like the feelings of hopelessness in session happen regularly. Maybe you need to have a heart to heart with Austin-T and clarify very specifically what sort of help you are seeking from him. It sounds like he really cares alot about you and really wants to help. He just didn't go about it in the right way.