Hi everyone. I'm new to this board but I hope talking to you all about some of my problems will help me. I have been unhappy for a couple years and would just cry for no reason until finally I was fed up and decided to see the psychiatrist last winter. This was of course when my husband was over in Iraq. I had just had an indiscretion with someone I thought was exciting. It was mental anguish for me, my first time. He came home and I was still not happy athough my doctor had switched me from 60mg prozac to paxil to lexapro. I had also taken ambien, ativan and klonopin that he RXed. So my sweetie left to go to Korea for a year and all of a sudden I got 6 tattoos, 10 piercings, 15 more indiscretions, bisexual experience, drinking a fifth of alcohol in 2 days- each week, using crystal meth, passing one 3 credit hour class when my schedule had 18 credits, hanging out with a violent person and having unprotected sex in the first 2 months after he left. Too me this isn't a big problem because this is what I want to do. My doctor started me on 80 mg of Geodon. I had nightmares everynight, heart palpitations and a racing heart beat. My doctor will no longer give me klonopin because he doesn't want to "allow" for the crystal use. I have made a consious decision to stop using it. He switched me to 300 mg of lithium twice a day. I hope this helps. I am still having terrible anxiety, I can barely talk to people in stores and look at them in the face or wait in line-yikes. Do you think the indiscretions are because I'm not happy with my life, my husband, I am forced to getting a degree in something I don't want because we are moving in a year and I found my calling too late or that it is the bipolar? Sound off please. Thanks.