I think it's inconsiderate of your cousins not to send you a condolence card. I think you should be honest and share your feelings. If your Aunt is intrusive then tell her and as far as her hubby goes - tell him to back off or he's gonna get it between the legs. Sorry for my bluntness but my own brother inlaw tried to fondle me when I was 13 - he didn't succeed and these kind of guys make me sick. Don't waste your time with toxic people - tell them how you feel. If they don't like it too bad.