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Aug 25, 2009, 05:31 AM
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Member Since: Jun 2009
Posts: 49
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Hi Tonny,
I'm sure a lot of us felt the same way when we first went to t. In fact, I think a lot of us still feel the same off and on. Much of what you describe is very familiar. I was worried about being "put away" too, esp. for the suicidal tho'ts that runs thro' my head. However, I have since told my T about these tho'ts and I am still here! I've learned from experience and from others, that it takes more than just saying you have the tho'ts to put you away. You must actually make the threat (so don't do that!) of doing harm to yourself or others. Once I admitted my tho'ts, I have found it freed up my mind to talk about other issues I was having. I felt so much relief. If you are still not sure, talk to your T about how much can be said w/o actually being involuntarily hospitalized. I did and have never looked back since. I told my T that everything I have told him since I started t., was, and still is, the honest truth. He was very glad about that. It shows that you trust your T. If I feel uncomfortable about revealing anything, I write it down in my journal and read it a few times, and maybe, over time, you may feel comfortable about discussing it, but until then, you don't have to tell your T anything that makes you uncomfortable. I started to reveal more because I wanted to get better faster. My reasoning was that, if he didn't know me, then how can he help me! But, yes, it takes trust, so if you still do not trust or feel comfortable w/ your T to open up to him/her, maybe you need to spend more time talking to him, or eventually, if (s)he doesn't "fit" you, you can always find a new T. Good luck and take care!  Hope your t. went well!
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