Dear Wanttoheal,

You nailed a few things on the head. I do see about "a gazillion sides to things" and it slows me down or stops me completely. It is the adult curse of DID because we have important decisions to make and here we are putzing around with a committtee in our head who can't agree on even simple things some days.

Also like you mentioned I too have a super-struggle making decisions. I am still trying to get back to being able to believe I have a future. I have never been able to make a goal and show myself how to do it and then do it. I used to write term papers the night before because it was less difficult than figuring out a plan to do the paper step by step in increments. The funny thing was I always got pretty good grades. Wish I was a winner these days. Thanks for your empathy and compassion!!!

Dear TurquoiseSea,

Thank you too for being so kind. I am just gonna have to accept that my spouse will not change and let that hope die. If he hasn't done it by now, after 29 years of marriage he never will. Vain hopes are more painful than accepting a loss and moving on. The support you and other's have given does help so much.

Dear Calista + 12, Thank you for gentle words of sympathy and understanding. They do help. Last night just got extra tuff for a while as someone deleted part of a post of mine and I very much disagree with their "reasons". I guess if this place was all perfecct there would be no room for me and my messies. OY VEY!!!