You all are right. Thank you so much for your support.

As Sky said simply looking for a new doctor can make me feel better. I emailed the partial program asking where the doctor I met there had gone and now I know that if I decide to fire my current doctor I have somebody lined up that I like.

I have dug myself out of my hole and have a better attitude now. Tomorrow I have an appt with my psychiatrist and I am going to confront him on a few things and ask him if he is burned out. I really, really want to go back to work and need his support to renew my nursing license. I think I am taking too many meds and have been stable for quite a long time so I would like to reduce my meds. Perhaps it is the meds that are keeping me stable but if so then we can always resume them if needed, right?

I am going to take the GRE and if I score crappy I will forget about school. If I score high I will keep thinking about it and see how much energy I have after returning to work. I am in no hurry. I still have a bit of mothering to do before my son is ready to be kicked from the nest. He will have to be self sufficient before I can go to school full time.