thankyou sittingatwatersedge and Melbadaze
what would help my friend ? .....
patience, sanity lol , time out, a moments peace, (maybe had that today )not to be so hard on herself
, to accept that what it is is what it is (no its not!!!! grrrrrrrrr) to do somthing nice for her every day ( if she thought she deserved it lol) dunno dunno dunno...... maybe to get another job
(if i cant manage this one how will i manage another job lol)to be able to give up or at least cut down on negative thooughts and SI impulses...... to belive she deserved to have good things happen to her and that she deserved to be happy........
sad now
sorry
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts 
its how many times you get back up! 
(Thanks to fenrir for my Picture 
)
When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown,
Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.
by Patrick Overton, author and poet