My Support Forums - View Single Post - vaguely remember session... trig

Kiya · Aug 28, 2009, 02:35 PM

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Originally Posted by sunrise

(((((Kiya))))) Wow, what a lot to take in on your first session back.

agreed - waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much @_@ (((Sunny))))

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Who is "everyone"?Everyone thinks the answer is for you to be taking meds or for you to get off of them? Everyone was people in general who believe meds are the quick fix - T said that to me while I couldn't speak and my eyes kept leaking when I wanted to shout NO ONE IS LISTENING TO ME!!!!! It sounds to me like it would be helpful for you to meet with all your medical people (psych nurse and the "too many doctors" your PNP refers to) and get everyone on the same page. Yeah, that would be helpful - good advice, thanks I know you have a case worker--She booted me - I'm not really in her program (A/D) and she is waaaaaay overwhelmed. If they do think you would be better off without meds, is it ALL meds? Or get off some of them but stay on others (e.g. the one for anxiety)? I only take two - and i just don't know what the PNP is talking about - I spoke with her on the phone; "too many prescribers" - i only have one, "too many practioners" - yeah ok, ummm a T and a PCP. *shakes head* Kiya, I think they are being very irresponsible not to coordinate care with each other when it comes to meds. I AGREE!!!! But I think they are trying to - T said they all spoke with each other in the hallway (that's how they have meetings on their busy schedules) It sounds like your Psych nurse has just had it with the involvement of too many docs and is worried about doing more harm than good since so many cooks are stirring the same pot. Hey - that's exactly what she said "Too many cooks in the kitchen" I hope you can get this really important issue straightened out really soon.

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I agree completely with this [not healing when in a bad space]. When I finally was not living with him, it was so much more doable to move forward. Thanks for reminding me of this! I thought that you had been working towards moving out? I remember you writing about that a number of times, as if that was the goal? Didn't you go to visit some housing that was a possibility? I thought you were very positive about that. Yeah - but it is all a 3 year wait period, and you have to be on disability (another 2-3 year wait period) and i reminded T of this and she said "No - there are other ways - and if you do not get disability, we have to work something out - this cannot go on."

Kiya, what is the action she is taking? I think "being more bold and taking charge" - but other than that i have no idea because i fell into some black abyss and can't seem to hear her! It sounds like she talked a lot, but what action did she take or say she was going to take?

What is the way out that you want? T suggested me taking a room somewhere - but the thing is, I can't always pay rent - and i only pay $300 as it is - usually rooms are more and then there is also utilities. I have a diabetic cat and a fish, and I also think it iwll be important to live in my own space - not a *room* where I still feel imprisoned (anxiety) in my own made cell... does that make sense?? with ptsd, I am constantly alert for any sound, any "danger" and feel i cannot do the healing work (crying, grieving, whatever) in someone else's house. Have you told anyone the solution that you want? I did - the SW knows, and I just told t in an email the other day. Why won't the solution you want work? money... waiting on dis. having to have a place for all my stuff if i do take "just a room" i'm a pack rat (well, hello - i'm a multiple!!! it's not all just Kiya's! some is ours too!!!!) Maybe your T could help you work toward this alternative solution, if it is possible. (I am sure you have probably been down this road before, but just wondering why your solution is not an option...) It all just seems so overwhelming.

Kiya, this sounds so hard. Maybe as the next couple of days passes you will be able to process and start on solutions. The meds question sounds paramount.

I thought so, too, but T thinks housing is paramount. it just seems easier right now to curl up in a ball and wait for the storm to pass - but I have a hunch it isn't going to pass.