Thank you, Bether! I do feel better today. I wrote out what I want to tell my T but I don't think I have to call her, at least not yet. She's IN it with me, so she KNOWS how my feelings about her have changed.

You're right--I feel connected to my T on a deep level. And it's REAL, not a fantasy. I'm not sure I trust it yet, but it's tangible. If I call her, she would agree.

I know therapy is different for everyone, but for me, having what I call this "normal" relationship with my T was my primary goal. Maybe it's what others call a secure attachment. I worked on other issues at the same time as working on the primary one.

I'll think about finding an outlet to fantasize. I'd like to write also, but I've got to set aside the time to do it. Thanks for your input!