T was hard yesterday and i had a sad session with pdoc today.
now im feeling very guilty and alone.
pdoc reminded me that i can call him on the weekends and he promised to call back, and he said i could see him twice next week if needed.

i love pdoc so much and im sorry that he's still got me after all he's tried .

he told me some really personal stuff about himself today, and now the gap between us is widening because he's such a great man and i'm worse than nothing.