I felt that strong urge/compulsion to write to the man who rejected me today. I think I may have reached a "breakthrough," though, because I DIDN'T!!!! I had become physically ill, stopping up the Ceramics class commode!!, the day after my last chatty, friendly email to him. "Artist" used the analogy that I was "getting rid of an old boyfriend," and that may have been closer to the truth than the humor suggested. Others here suggested my body was sending me a message. I agree...a very hard message.
This morning, I had in my mind all that I wanted to share with him, about my classes, his teaching job, etc. Even telling him I had let go of "romantic" thoughts of him. Damn!!! He doesn't care!!! Doesn't contact me at all, and only replies politely to my beseeching messages. I have felt this urge to write to him about every 10 days to 2 weeks. Today is another 10 day mark, and I talked myself out of it.
Thanks to all of you here for your helpful feedback.
Seeker