Had a fun night last night. Got together with friends. Hubby was funny and affectionate. I felt like I was acting "normal" even though not feeling all the way there, and was proud of myself for it. Then I got home and thoughts came flooding in about all the other times I'd felt that way only to have friends leave or hurt me. Or have hubby shut down. Today it's me shutting down. I don't believe the fun last night was real. I feel like it was a dream and that the friends I was with aren't really my friends. I'm just a project for them, a charity case. But because I felt so good last night, it makes today feel so much worse. Anyone know what I'm talking about or am I just rambling?