I feel like screaming that to my friends. I feel like shouting how dare you judge me like that. But i wont. I have chosen to forgive them. Basically this whole spat started because one of them had been requesting space which i gave. But we had been planning a sponsered walk for charity on Sept 10th which ends in London and i had to look at booking my hotel this weekend as any London/UK people looking at this will know London hotels get booked up very quickly. So i had to contact the person who would be my walking partner and said i had booked the travelodge hotel and as it was room only gifted it for both of us. She basically e mailed back and said thanks but no thanks i already have a hotel. Without telling me anything about it and mentioned the hotel we had both looked at a few weeks earlier. So i e mailed back and said i had managed to get myself a room at the hotel she had booked so that basically we could be together as friends do. And then her friend came on line and ordered me to stop e mailing her saying she needed her space
What am i supposed to do? Wait until she had contacted me presumbably sometime next week and be frozen out of a hotel room. I HAD to know one way or another this weekend. I tried to explain and i even went on to say i had depression too and had hid that from many people.
Now they are all ganging up on me saying i dont know what depression is, that i have not repsected their wishes etc. Really hurtful comments which i have no intention of responding to. I just feel very let down and hurt. I think it will be good for me to at least have something to discuss with my counsellor. God i had to hide this from my own Father. Dont want him to know about how depressed i really feel. Like others have said, very easy to hide depression.
Now i have a dilema. Should i go to London or not I dont think my walking partner and friend would welcome me. She hates me now. I wish i could turn back the clock of the last 48 hours. But i guess it was a question of dammed if i do, dammed if i dont. I had to know one way or another. If i had left it, it would have been too late to book.