Okay, so this is my second reply to my own post. Sheesh!

So... I'm not being "Abby - Somebody" when I get a serious attack of the "break and runs" when my current husband (who is very compassionate and in no way abusive) raises his voice in frustration toward inanimate objects (like when he looses his checkbook for the 9 millionth time)?

That's not abnormal for a survivor of spousal abuse in a former marriage?

Seriously, when he raises his voice in frustration - even when it's not aimed at me in any way - I get a major attack of the fraidy cats and want to bolt out the door. He thinks I'm nuts because I'll get really frightened and will sometimes start to cry - or I'll go really silent and I will leave and go for a long drive before coming back home.