(((((Catherine))))
Thank you
I try to believe I am cared for/about.
It does have to start with the internal "me" accepting and believing---
So very hard to silence the old tapes and get rid of the old memories that confused, invalidated, minimized, covered up---etc.......
white_iris, yes it is very hard to do, overwhelming at times when we see how many there are! jme, but when we recognize them, don't run from them, "confront" them...is when we have the chance to take away their power. it's not easy, I know...holding on to our resolve feels like a never-ending and familiar struggle.
it's ok to take a time out, rest, then keep crawling...remember the saying; even if I fall flat on my face, it's still forward movement....fall and crawl.

We don't have to do it all at once, small victories lead to big ones. We aren't going to have a Eureka! moment when everything magically falls into place--that comes later when we realize we've made progress against long standing beliefs.
glad for the reminder that even crawling is ok.
my crawling now is just inch by inch--slow progress--but i need the reminder that progress is progress.....
so need the caring right now.
have to believe i deserve it......
you do deserve it, period. you are a worthwhile human being with a kind heart and gentle spirit. And a strong one at that...
perhaps you will soon accept it and the crawling will become walking tall.

we are not born to be garbage disposals, targets, or scapegoats. letting go of those things were frightening to me; if I wasn't them, who was I??
I took many detours and wrong paths when I started my journey...strangely, each of them contributed to my well being further down the road. I learned to stop fearing them, but I did not welcome them...quite frankly they were one more thing I had to work through. At times, I felt if I heard that phrase one more time then I was going to Big time Barf...and on occasionally I did just that.
I mean come on; being intent on recovering is fine, being obsessed with it is not healthy in my way of thinking...

thanks again......
we'll spread that thanks all around...we give, we get, we don't keep score

In Peace