I am amazed by your strength. I am 22 years old, and been divorced for the past 2 months after a 2 1/2 year marriage. My parents were against the idea form the beginning, but I thought this was the man for me. I too know there's something to learn from this but I don't know what? My ex mil was divorced 15 years before my marriage and my husband had made it his responsibility to look after his mother and sister. I thought I could handle it, but I couldn't.

If we argued, she knew what it was about, and would remark me about it. Her bathroom window opened up into my bedroom, where she could hear everything that went on. Our arguments and intimate moments were public knowledge, and I was as a dutiful Indian woman is expected to do take over everything. From the cooking, to even the washing in th house.

At first I thought this was what everybody went through, and then they threw me out of the house. I waited for 5 months, calling him, smsing him, begging him to let us resolve our issues, go for counselling, and nothing. After 5 months he came to fetch me, promising things would change, we'd go for counselling, everything.

2months into that his sister came back from her marriage, pregnant, wanting the same things and arguning for everything I did. Nobody told me. I was expected to see to all of them, and then with everything that was going on, my husband started becoming emotionally abusive towards me.

I booked appointments for counselling, and he kept making me cancel. the last appointment I had made, I told him that I wasn't going to cancel, so he threw me out again infront of all his family-grandparents, uncles, everyone.

Mine happened on the 9 May 2009, 2months later he sent the divorce. He blamed me for everything and refused to let me take my things. All the gifts that they had given me they asked for it back, and when I refused to give it back, his mother went around telling everybody I had stolen the stuff.

Yes, I do miss him, and I wish that this had never happened to me. But I also realise how lucky I am to be out. I'm afraid that this will happen again, and I don't know what to do to avoid that, which is why obiswife, I think you have enourmous strength and I have to say I think you've grown already....