Lately I have been pushing the one's I love away the most. Today I was hanging with my ex-boyfriend of two years. He is in the Military and we hardly ever hung out and when he came back from being over sea's I pushed him away saying harsh things. When we hung out today I told him that I did that, because I didn't want to get hurt again like I always do. In the end I messed things up worse and I don't know what to do. I feel like I want to blame the fact that I have BP on my crappy relationships, but I know it's just me as a person. Does anyone else ever do this or is it just me?