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Hello Amberfreakled and welcome to PC.
I’m very familiar with the situation that you’re talking about. In my house it is my husband’s parents that are this way. It didn’t get any easier here, they had my 18 year old daughter in tears because they excluded her yet again. You’re an adult, and you’ve done nothing wrong there’s no reason to grovel for forgiveness. As hard as it is to do, rather than get upset about it when your parents make a negative comment about this or any other aspect of your life respond simply with “I’m sorry you feel this way.”
Have you talked to them? I know that this can make very little difference, but it’s important that you set up boundaries and stick to them.
What does your husband have to say about all of this? I know there were YEARS of fights here, particularly when my husband was in the service and we returned home he expected that our time be split 50 -50 between our parents homes who live 45 miles apart. My parents took vacation when we came home to visit and spent every waking moment with my kids. I was on vacation there. His parents didn’t alter their schedule at all. Thursdays were bingo night whether we were there or not. My father in law would come home from work and head out to the greenhouse to work on his hobby. I was stuck in an empty house literally all day and night trying to entertain my kids in a house that wasn’t kid friendly. My mother in law worked afternoons and went out with the ladies after work. She got up an hour before work. My father in law would leave before my kids got up and wouldn’t come back in the house (except for dinner) until after they were in bed. But if we didn’t spend time there OMG!
One time my parents came to pick us up for the day to go to a function for my side of the family, my oldest son asked to spend the night at my parent’s house and I let him. I was due to return to my parent’s house in two days, they didn’t notice that we were gone all day nor that my son was gone period. But once my parents came to pick my daughter and I up and they had my son with them they were mad as hell. How can you get mad that the child wasn’t there when you didn’t even notice he was gone?
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I've been married for 24 years and have four wonderful children.
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