Trigger
Trigger
Trigger

Usually I just come in here, read a few posts and then I'm all better. Not this evening.

Too much is going on, beyond my control. I've carried so much responsibility for so long. I'm just worn out. I've fallen into the bare necessities...just enough to get by.

My usual support people are busy. Pdoc is tomorrow and I have a brand new x-acto blade in my stylus. I'm obsessing. I haven't done any serious cutting in over 5 or 6 years. Only accidents. (Don't go there about my subconscious...I know better than you and I'm not asking for analysis) Sorry to be so pointed.

Yesterday, I needed to make a precise cut on some core-plast and needed that nice, new, shiny, sharp #11 blade. Romanticising it, aren't I? I would derive such macabre pleasure to describe in ghastly detail what I'm thinking. But I know I should not trigger others. Yes, I posted a trigger icon, but what about those who are just drawn all the more, because of it?

I just needed to own my thoughts, vague as they are. Say 'em because you know what they are, put it out there and ask for understanding from those who know me and those who don't. Thank you.