I think you're doing great; just the fact that you could talk about this with your T. You have a lot of self-awareness and I trust you will figure it out.

I agree with this Tree. Youre amazingly aware and it will help you to figure it out.

That the unlovable feeling is at the core and it has to do with growing slowly to believe something different. That you are lovable for who you are and not what you do.

I relate to every word you said. I do not remember ever feeling like I needed my mother. I must have wanted her at some point when I was younger, but I shut down before a time I can remember. Maybe it is what you said- that I would get hurt for sure and she was not going to be giving me what I needed so I shut down from her young. I, like you, was afraid of being that vulnerable.

Tree, you have come such a long way- you can learn to be vulnerable and allow the love in without believing its laughable that Tree has love. That Tree is a fantastic, wonderful, warm person and we all LOVE her!