I have those feelings of not belonging too. Nothing in the world really makes sense to me and I think that's why. I don't know...I just know my self-esteem and self worth tends to be very low...

I know that I can't always control what arouses me. Just...why that?

And back to sexuality, sometimes I do get aroused looking at pictures of women. I haven't fantasized about having sex with another woman, but seeing an image of a woman nude or scantily clad and posing provocatively arouses me. Porn of women does little to nothing for me. But that and being attracted to male to female transgenders really makes me question things...