I know that you love your husband, and you want to make sure he gets what he needs. IMO I would ask him to come to therapy with you, and tell him that you can't have sex until you heal from this. I think that he would be understanding about it. Personally I think that it's making you relive it all over again. I think that your body is telling you that you aren't ready if it hurts. Not just that you can tell that you don't trust your husband in that way. It's not your fault, or his.