Hi MM. Sometimes our past does control what we do. You may want to look there. It may control who we are and how we act. It also can affect your selection process and who you marry.

It appears that both of you have your issues, so I would have to go along with the family theraphist on the classes at least. Sounds like both of you need it. You adults need to get something settled because of the kids involved. Yes unfortunately the children can be affected by everything that you two do. You mentioned fighting between the girls. You two are not giving them good examples.

More drugs is not always the correct answer. Sometimes we have to look at what causes us to react the way we do. Just taking something so that your "mood" will be better may only be masking the real issues. Also if you get your mood to where you can tolerate all of this, will you be able to feel those kids and properly take care of them? It is important that the children feel your love. They need it like the air they breathe. Can they do that if you are trying not to feel? I am not saying you do care or do not love them. Just trying to help you think about their needs.

If you are not sure why or for who you are taking the pills, then you might want to think very strong about talking to a professional about that. Just wanting more meds is a cry for help. I really do feel your confusion over this situation. I know you are hurting real bad right now. I think you should try as soon as you can and see what services are available to you that will be the best for you and your children. My thoughts are with you.