i have no problem expressing what i think or feel to anyone - it bothers me not at all (perhaps because there is no emotional investment)
i agree with you that it must be some sort of defense mechanism - i just know not how it came to be or how to be rid of it
i suppose i have some long term friends that i truly trust
and i believe if any sort of real relationship people have to share all of their thoughts and feelings - so this is not the problem
the problem is that i am not certain i have any feelings - or i at least am unable to access them
i love my children very much (i have two boys) so i know i CAN love - but ?????
still confused i am!

"Those who Dance are thought Mad by Those who Hear Not the Music."