Even if you don't have insurance there are ways to get help.

If you are in the US, there might be a county mental health clinic in your town/city. They will have afordable Ts and Pdocs. Also a lot of Ts and pdocs have sliding scale fees, you pay what you can aford. And a lot of clinics and private clinics have free samples of meds.

NAMI is a good organization that may be able to help you figure all this out too. Plus they have free support group meetings.

They have a web site.

I'm so sorry you are so sad and lonely. I can relate.