Today I had my session with my T and I nearly made her cry
Near the end of session, she asked me how I thought things went today (after a pretty tough session nonetheless), and I told her about the stupid stupid article on here that Christina posted about RE: dependency in therapy. I told her that I thought the article was very opinionated and I didn't really agree with it, but that it raised some concerns in my mind about therapy.

I told her it bothered me that the author referred to therapists as "role playing" and just generally not being authentic in their client relationships, and that at the end of the day they don't really care about us and we are just essentially their job.

As soon as I said that, I corrected myself that I wasn't implying like I felt that about her, but that it was just bothering me.

She then said to me that she had to tell me something that she thought I already knew which was that she really did care about me and think about me outside of session (which is where she teared up) but that she does have an outside life that I will probably not know very much about.

After this I started tearing up too, and the rest of our conversation afterwards is a huge blurr and I couldn't tell you what we spoke about.

Part of me feels like that semi-confirmed that she is authentic in our relationship (which I wasn't doubting though...), and then there is another part of me that feels horrible if she thinks that I was intending to accuse her of doing those things the author described.

And not to be dramatic, but I'm just so emotionally-disraught right now that I physically feel ill and couldn't tell you what I learned in the past 3 hours of class.

I don't know what to do