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Sep 25, 2009, 04:26 PM
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Member Since: Aug 2009
Location: Fringes of the bell-shaped curve
Posts: 779
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tryingtobeme
I have an appt with T at noon. I really don't want to go. I should not have asked for this appointment. Do you think I should cancel? I mean I always bother him. He has other things he has to do, but me, I feel I can't go without seeing him.
I've now turned to alcohol since the cutting doesn't seem to be helping as much. I just had to say that. I have been hiding it from everyone. You all are the first people that I have told. I can't get through the day without a drink. Should I tell T, no I'm told by my others, that will only get me in more trouble.
I guess life is just a down hill slide. Someday it will end. Hopefully sooner rather than later.
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   By all means, ((((tryingtobeme)))) - keep your appointments with your T and tell him about everything - he is not there to pass judgment on you, but to help you - and he can't help you with things he doesn't know about. Since you are cutting and drinking, you know that these are indicators that you are obviously past the point of dealing with your feelings without some assistance - please let your T do his job and help you. Do not allow your depression, etc., to lie to you - you deserve a good, healthy, fulfilling life just as much as anyone else on this planet. Let the educated, trained, and experienced professionals help you attain that life. I don't believe that it is life that you want to end - I believe that it's the pain and suffering that you want to end so you can truly LIVE free from the pain and suffering. Do not cause yourself even more pain and suffering by doing injury to yourself - you've had enough injury inflicted upon you - now is the time to do everything you possibly can to heal - to take advantage of every form of assistance available to you to accomplish that healing. Please keep us updated on how you are feeling and doing - we are always here to hear you and help support you.
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"I walked a mile with Pleasure; she chattered all the way, But left me none the wiser for all she had to say. I walked a mile with Sorrow and ne'er a word said she; But oh, the things I learned from her when Sorrow walked with me!"
(Robert Browning Hamilton; "Along The Road")
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