I'm Bill and I'm agoraphobic.

The following might upset some of you.

Cause i'm going to talk about my experience with recovery from agoraphobia and I did it in spite of therapy. This post is geared toward myself and those of you who have trouble with therapy.

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I had to leave my psych place cause they were abusive to me. They did not seem to understand my problem. I was ag because I was scared of being sexually abused again. Also, because my self-esteem was very down because a friend of mine had kicked me out of his home in 1996 and at that time, too, a man had romantically rejected me. Not to mention, another abusive relationship.

when I tried to process this in treatment, they would not let me address my abuse/self-esteem issues. The idea there was that I was "crazy" and "didn't know what I was saying". I dealt, also with some misogynistic men and women there.

Well, for 8 years, this went on and I finally left treatment because not only did they have that attitude, they were outright outrageously abusive to me. An example: While I was in the hospital van, two ppl sitting on either side of me tried to molest me and when I called for h elp, the driver threatened to kick ME off the van and tried to arrange it so that I couldn't ride the van anymore. That was the final straw.

I am going to mention in my letter to the State Licensing Board that I was in treatment there for 8 years---and it was a waste. I had not left before cause I was desperate. I had nowhere to go.

But that was before I met my husband Dane and my ACoA sponsor, Ani.

I processed all my self-esteem/abuse issues with them and they LISTENED. The UNDERSTOOD. They DID NOT JUDGE ME.

that is why I love these sites.

Ppl here UNDERSTAND.

I am not knocking therapy; I am happy for anyone who is fortunate enough to find the right therapy/therapist who can work with them. But I did not.

If anyone is discouraged, don't give up! Find a friend, a site, a place, anything to keep you going!

You deserve it; you are worth it.

So hang in there.

some understanding and TLC can go a LONG WAY.

Billi