How do you tell your mom she sucks at her job?

So my mom sucks at being my mom. She has no idea that anything is wrong and no idea who I am. We fight so much and most of the time it's over the stupidest things. I'm tired of trying to be the bigger person in the relationship and tired of trying to make her happy and most of all I'm tired of trying to make a relationship with her when there is obviously nothing there to make a relationship with.

I want so badly to tell her to f*** off and leave me alone. And that I am not her baby anymore and she needs get over her empty nest syndrome and realize that while she is throwing herself a pity party because her kids do not need her as much anymore and were all leaving home and become strong independent people that she is loosing me in the process. I want to tell her that for years I have done my hardest to try and make her happy but it's the hardest things I've done in my life and I'm over it.

I want her to realize that things are hard for and take that into account when she is constantly nagging me about the stupid things and I want her to realize that those little things have and enormous effect on me. I want her to realize that she is the reason for some of my problems. I want her to realize that things have gotten so bad that I have attempted suicide before.

I want her to know that I need more help that she can give and that she can't fix me because I don't need to be "fixed" I just need someone there I can talk to without yelling at me or being judgmental. I want someone that I can trust and that isn't her. The end of my rope is coming up fast and I don't know what to do anymore because I'm lost.

I'm lost because I don't know who I am. I have spent years hiding my feeling and trying to change who I was in an attempt to make her happy but I am failing miserably. I realize that I will never be the person that she wants me to be but now I need to find help in order to find myself and become a person that I am proud to be and not be ashamed of myself. I want to be able to express my emotions and not be ridiculed for them and not have them thrown back in my face.

I honestly am just done with everything. I need to find a therapist but most therapist require your parents knowing if you are under 18 and sadly I am only 17 so what should I do now. I have talked to my school psychologist twice but It's just about the surface things and the fights with my mom and dad. Should I continue to talk to him and go more in depth about what's really going on or do I go meet with a therapist and have my parents find out but I know in reality there going to find out either way because what I would say to these people involve harming myself so they would be required to tell my parents. Joy.

Any advice?
-Lost
-Confused
-Mad/Angry
-Hurt
-Depressed
-and the list continues

Sincerely,
Morgan