this weekend was hard.

boyfriend drove me down 6 hour trip to home after a shift at work friday got in at past 1am, all to see dying person in hospital who was like grandma to me. She wasn't very aware, hospitals scary and no fun places we was kinda wantisng to run aways we really wantesed runs but stayed for her and family. Stay there long time no food to eat =( was very hungry got back. And next day (sunday) drove back here nother 6 hour trip. Sad cuz as soon as getting back I did bad thing and feel very sad/guilty for it.

So sitting here, exhausted very sad, need to work tomorrow. Was supposed to work today but had to ask for a day off so I could go there.

Just so hard, feel numb empty and so so so so sad.