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Originally Posted by lynn09
(((((Deedee))))) - Absolutely unbelieveably outrageous and cruel behavior on his part!! Does he realize that he is teaching his son to be the very same way? To be so cruel and disrespectful to others? How do you let go and not care anymore? You only have to let go of him and his son specifically, Deedee - not your hope, your dream of having a loving, trusting, mutually-respectful relationship with someone - don't ever let go of those hopes and dreams. Simply understand that he is NOT qualified for the job. He is not capable of fulfilling that role and you cannot afford to play that mind game of trying to fit him into it. Right now he is within your line of sight, he is the current object of your affection, he is the physical representation of your hopes and dreams, but you have to realize that he does not and cannot epitomize the qualities you want in a relationship - and he most certainly does not deserve the kind of love you are capable of giving. Don't throw your pearls before swine - you must find someone who recognizes and values the love you have to give - you must find someone who cherishes you. Just because this person does not and/or cannot cherish you that does not mean that you are not worth cherishing - you ARE! Don't sell yourself, your love, or your life short, Deedee. See this man for who and what he really is and rid yourself of him. As I've said before, I have been THERE - and the only thing I regretted afterwards was that I wasted so much time, energy, love, and tears on someone who did not deserve any of it - someone who took my most precious possessions (my self and my love) and threw them away - someone who was incapable of cherishing me as I did him. I hope you can get out of there soon - that is a toxic environment and only serves to poison you a piece at a time. Please keep posting, Deedee - we will provide all the support we can.   
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Lynne09, thank you for this e-mail. Well said. I'm going to print that up and carry it with me when I start thinking with my heart, and not my head.
I am trying so hard to just get angry and not love him anymore, but I'm just not there yet I guess. I got my keys to my apartment Sunday, and I spoke to my realtor lastnight. He said he's had people interested but they don't want to see the house until the price drops. So i told him I wanted to have an open house instead before we drop the price on the house. He said we can do it on 10/11, which is in two weeks, but I told him with the situation I'm in and how my ex is acting I would prefer to start moving all my furtniture out, and not worry about having the house looked live in so it will sell faster, I just want to move on, and get in a place where there's no memories, a fresh start. Please keep giving me advice. I know I've still got a long road ahead of me.
Deedee