while reading your post it brought back some memories for me when I was married to my ex. he too was abusive and that killed all desire I had for him. when I left him my desire came back once I found someone else that I cared about. Depression is another issue with sexual desire. it takes it away and so does some medications. I think if you can get your depression to ease up and find the right person you might find that desire again. Being loved does make one want it! good luck hon.