I do think I will bring this up to my husband as an enabling issue. Again to be clear, she really doesn't want us to adopt the baby, just be the grandparent type figures "here mom take the kid while I..." My daughter volunteered me because I've done this many times in the past for family, friends and acqaintances alike. It would not be out of character for me to do this at all, to volunteer myself. Her line of thinking I imagine was "you do it for everyone else, and Amy is part of the family, why wouldn't you do it for her."

My very issue with Amy is her lack of boundaries. When her sister was pregnant with her third child she returned to town with the father of that baby who did do drugs and hung out with people I did not want in my home. I not only had Ally here but her boyfriend as well. When they weren't here, they were calling my 16 year old daughter to run them all over like a taxi service. In this state driving priviledges are tiered, it was not legal for my daughter to drive with more than one non-sibling in her car. There was complete and utter lack of concern that by asking her to do these things my daughter's driving could/would be removed if caught doing this.

In this case attitude goes a long way. I did not want to like Ally, there is no excuse in this day and age for having baby after baby knowing that you are unable to care for them. She had issues to be sure, but I really didn't mind her being here once I got to know her. She was polite, picked up after herself and was pleasant to be around. If she wasn't with such an incredible loser she would have been welcome here indefinately.

I am tired of being the bad guy just because I don't want to be taken advantage of yet again.