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Oct 01, 2009, 02:03 PM
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Member Since: Feb 2009
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 12,269
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Hi Zen,
I'm sorry you're having alot of anxiety right now. I read your first post at the beginning of this thread, where you stated you avoid holiday dinners with family friends because you don't want to be in the uncomfortable positiion of being around your estranged brother. If you're invited by those friends - I think you should go and show them and your brother that you're doing better than before.
Regarding your job searches - times are realy tough right now economically. It takes alot of guts to sit down for an interview - good for you!! When you're being asked about past experience try not to offer negative information about past jobs and keep your answers brief unless they ask. In reference to geting police clearance for the daycare job- don't worry about that - it's very routine. Even parents who want to help out regularly at school need to do that.
Regarding your anxiety - have you tried deep breathing exercises. It really helps to calm the nerves. Try to remember that half the things are brains throw at us, never happen! Think of those thoughts are being like SPAM on your computer - sift through the thoughts and ask yourself if they're legitimate or not. Instead of getting worked up you can just let the thoughts come and accept they're there. Our stress gets worse when we become alarmed by the thoughts and then we start 'stressing about the worries' - it a viscious cycle.
You mentioned you were very stressed first thing in the morning - that's a good time to lay in bed and do the slow deep breathing exercises. I'm very proud of you, that you forced yourself to get ready anyways(high five)!!
Try not to feel discouraged and keep up the good work.
At the beginning of your thread you compare your life and say how you don't have a BF or kids yet - please don't compare yourself to what you think you should be doing or how other people's lives are. You are your own person. I really think a boyfriend would just complicate things at this time for you. Keep focusing on keeping your life on track and I hope you hear some good news soon. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers 
__________________
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