I think it's great you found this site, it has really helped me a lot. I was kind of looking for someone who had been in my shoes too, I haven't found anyone yet, but it's still great to get another perspective on things, and everyone here is so great and will give you there honest opinion and insite. I don't really understand your situation, I have never heard of anyone acting the way your husband is. But if he's not willing to get therapy, then how can you go on the way you are? It must be awful for you. Sorry if that seemed insensitive I know you can't just turn off your feelings for him, I know you see a good person in him. Good luck, my thoughts are with you.