Here's the background: I am dating a wonderful woman for six months. I'm 39; she's 40. I've never been married. She is divorced and has been for about 10 years. She got married at 22. Her ex-husband was and still is an alcoholic who was abusive verbally and pyschologically, and at least one time physically with her. Recently, she told me that at the end of her marriage, she had an affair that lasted six months until she broke it off. She was not separated at the time the affair started but served divorce papers to her ex-husband while the affair was happening. I don't know how frequently she was in contact with the other guy. But she broke it off then and there and has had no further contact with the lover since then.

Of course, this makes me ask, how to approach this? Part of me wants to stay with her because prior to her telling me this, I thought we had great long term potential. Part of me wants to end our relationship before we get serious. I don't believe the saying that once a cheater, always cheater. However, I do have reservations. If we do stay together, if we hit a rough patch, does this mean that she'll cheat again? She seemed utterly devasted that she did this.

I know that we need to discuss a lot more of this, but does anyone have any advice? help? guidance? Experienced something similiar? Topics that we should discuss? Books for guidance?

Thanks.