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I understand the feeling of shutdown. IRL people not understanding too. We are also very sorry for your loss and glad you could post here about your feelings and confusion about "normal". I feel sharing your relationship and what it meant to you is a tribute to this man. Now I know of one more kind soul who was here and did care. I hope the small parts of you can remember and cherish their trust in him as you do.
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 I love my fishies
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