oooOOOooo.....

MOMENT OF CLARITY

1. Don't create stressful situations!
2. Don't worry about what other people think of me!
3. I only need to answer to myself.

Well I guess the Partial Hospitalization Program is working, or perhaps it's the effexor/prozac/dexedrine/seroquel combination. This is the first time in the past 6 months that I have felt truly happy. I have 1 more week in the program, and then I go to the Intensive Out Patient Program for week, then back to work..part time.

I also just realized why I've been so depressed for the last 6 months, (basically since I got married) it's because my dad wasn't there. It has been so hard since he passed away. He was my best friend and the only barrier I had against my mom. I just need to think more positively abour the situation, like even though my mom stresses me out to no end, we're closer now then we ever were before and that he is in a pain free place where there is no worries, and one day i too will be there. Also to think of how proud he would've been about my wedding and my husband
and myself buying our first house.

WoW! Who's slightly manic?!?!? I need to go meditate now, to calm myself down.