(((((((((((rainbow)))))))))))

Sometimes when I am having painful feelings, I feel like I want to "do" something to make them go away...when what I really need to do is just sit with them, acknowledge them, feel them, and let them recede in their own time. When I am in pain, I feel like I will feel like that FOREVER if I don't "do" something...but it has never, ever lasted forever.

I wonder if you just need to let yourself grieve a bit? Perhaps you are feeling old feelings - a longing to be seen, and accepted, and loved by someone who is unavailable. That HURTS.

I was in SO much pain in my session last Thursday. It sounds dramatic now, but I almost didn't think I would survive it...it felt that bad. T did not try to make me feel better. He just sat with me, and witnessed what I was going through. I knew he was sad that I had to feel so much pain, but he let me feel it. I think that is part of the process of healing these deep, old wounds...to know that the pain is there, and to let ourselves feel it. For me, the more I run away from it, the tighter it hangs on.

Maybe you could be extra gentle with yourself. Make yourself some tea or hot chocolate and let yourself curl up under a soft blanket and read a book or watch a funny movie. Give the hurt part of yourself a little bit of what you wish T would give her

I don't know if this is helpful at all....it's just my experience.

I'm sorry you are in pain.