Melinda :-) -

Like a couple of the others...I will try not to be brash but I think it is important that you see another side to this.

I know that I have always been somewhat the controlling or jealous type. I am not saying that you are but please hear me out.

As you wrote all that you have; I could see especially without knowing exactly his past environments etc, a man in particular could feel controlled by some of the things you have mentioned. You need to do as others have said and not spend your time emailing and looking for jobs for him. He should be doing that part !!! You need to focus on YOU ! In the end if you make sure all your stuff is going in the right direction you will start to feel better about yourself.

In the end, as difficult as it seems for you right now, if he doesn't find a job (which I agree is the largest problem in your eyes; so much stems off of that in life), you most likely would not still be with him, right ? This is kinda like anything else; he has to do it for himself. :-)

It is very, very hard for me to bite my lip sometimes. My b/f is the most awesome man/ human I have ever known. When I hang my fears and insecurities on him, it is so not fair to him right? I have seen myself label him off of my past experiences when he no more deserves that than the man on the moon. (lol)

So, I guess my biggest point is to believe in you and in him. You have to give him a chance here and let him know you believe in him. Even if you don't totally at this point, sometimes if you have the attitude it will all fall into place and it will work out in a positive way in the end.

Sorry to be so long-winded; I hope that I haven't crossed any boundaries or upset you in any way. My thoughts are sometimes all over the board so I hope it makes sense also

Jen