well written (((((((((((((((iskm12)))))))))))))))))))))

I feel like I hide my true self too - a LOT. That the second a negative part showed itself my friends left me. Part of it was that I was so giving I attracted friends that were only interested in receiving, not in giving.

I don't know where you can find that friend you seek. But I do know you can post here, you can pm too. Personally I won't run from you at the first sign of darkness.

It sounds beautiful that you can sit in a tree with waves crashing. BEAUTIFUL. I'm glad you're safe and have a journal to get feelings into.

I know it's hard to know yourself if you've been hiding it for so long. You'll find it if you keep trying