Not to sound like a broken record, but I agree with the others...

But that said, I had a thought (scary, I know...)

When my husband (D) and I nearly broke up 4 years ago, I had told a (then) friend (male, and no longer a friend as he pushed boundries too far) that I wasn't getting involved seriously with anyone for at least a year after my divorce was final. I also stated that I didn't want to get married ever again. He pushed back, over and over to "not put those kind of limits" on myself (I found out later he was ready to propose to me as soon as my divorce was final).

As much as it might hurt, maybe you need to break up, you need to get on your own two feet and realize YOU can do it! I know it is scary. Interestly enough, facing that fear myself gave me access to inner strength I didn't know I had. It would probably be a good idea to get into therapy, if not only for you but your kids too. I know I am not a medical or mental health professional (see disclaimer below...), but I think you would find the majority would advise not getting into any kind of relationship for some time after the divorce is final. It's hard and lonely, I get that. But YOU need to be in a better place in your head, not only for you but the kids too. You may need time to find yourself. I have been with D since I was 21 and figuring out who I was at 31 was hard and scary, but I'm glad I did!

Good luck, and know you have support here, no matter what you decide...