i miss my dad today. it's coming up the two month anniversary of his death and i really miss him. i hate missing him because i get all mixed up and feel guilty and everything else cause someone inside starts saying awful things. it's hard. i can't even grieve like a person should/could. can't i just miss someone for a little while? can't i enjoy the fact that i had a few things about him to miss? i just wish i could think or feel something on my own for just a little bit...

i would like to cry for him and not have someone else get scared and upset cause i'm crying. i would like to cry and miss my dad for just a little while and it be ok.

that's asking too much though...

kd